Tag Archives: Poetry Book

A farewell from life…

It’s been a long road
I know I haven’t done you any good
but – our ways are parting now
forgive me if you could.

I know I’ve let you down
because now I’m sinking deep
watching you fade away
into a dreamless sleep.

There’s so much I could have done
to ease this walk of yours
but I stood in front of you
blocking all your doors.

I haven’t been the kindest
I wish you didn’t see
the flames that burned you down
were ignited by me.

It’s all my fault
I drowned all your dreams
I wanted to see you suffer
when you were begging on your knees.

I have no more words
but there’s so much I need to say
I wish I could have said it all
before the arrival of this day.

Now you must close your eyes
there awaits you another friend
from here you’ll have to move on
our journey has come to an end.

Embrace this new transition
there awaits you another road
you need to be brave now
because you are worth so much more.

I’m sorry
I wish I could repent
I’d give you all I have
if time was mine to control
I would have become your path.

A farewell from life

Poetry book: Curing My Venom
Sign up here to get the free kindle edition.

I’m drowning

Sometimes I get scared
and I don’t know why
but I want you to embrace me
and tell me it’s alright.

Because I trust you
more than I believe in myself
maybe because you become an anchor
when I’m crying for help.

Just don’t ever let me go
or the pieces joining me will shatter
tell me I am important
because I feel like I don’t matter.

I need you to praise me
and tell me what I am worth
because my mind is in chaos
and I feel like a curse.

Please don’t say anything
that will bring me down
because in this cruel sea
you’re the reason I haven’t yet drowned.

I’m not drowning. I think?

Poetry book: Curing My Venom
Read it for free on booksprout (limited time)

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A war between hope and despair

I opened my mouth, but I couldn’t speak.
“I understand,” she said kissing my cheek. “You don’t have to say a word. I know what is going on inside of you. The demons are stronger and they’re breaking through. You’re cracking because you’re losing your faith, but the sky is rumbling it’s calling your name. I know you’re afraid because you don’t know how to fly. Those voices in your head are making you cry. You’re breaking; I can see it through your chest. That organ pumping blood in your body won’t let you rest. I can feel the beat echo through my ears. You want to speak, but you’re afraid no one will hear. It’s getting dark inside; I can see your heart. You’re aching, your soul is ripping apart.”

She gently came and wrapped me in a warm cocoon. “Just swallow these pills, everything will be okay soon. You want to meet God and ask about all this. Death will be gentle, he’ll just give you a kiss. Everything will be over. You won’t have to fight. At the end of the tunnel, you’ll see a ray of light. No more panic attacks, no more fears. No more anxiety. No more tears. It’ll be over, and you won’t have to play pretend. It’s okay my love, everything will come to an end.”

I looked at her beautiful face, and then at those pills, she clenched in her fist. I didn’t want to die, but I was afraid to live. I had nothing to lose and nothing to give. I was dead inside, but my heart was still beating. I was losing and falling what was the point of breathing. Everything in life was a burden, what was the point of dying every day. Wouldn’t it be better to end it all today?

I extended my hand as I wrapped those pills in between my sleeves. I was tired of hoping. I was tired of those dreams. Maybe she was right, life would be better if I wasn’t even alive. I was tired of falling and sinking so low. If I was gone, no one would notice and maybe no one would know.

“No,” Hope said with a tattered voice as he stood in front of me blocking my view. “I know your hurting, but you have to pull through. This is your life and it’s your choice. Love how can you give up so easily when the war has just begun. You’re pulling your curtains just because you can’t see the sun. The clouds are heavy, I can feel the thunder. But you are a warrior and warriors don’t surrender. The ground is bleeding, and I can sense the blood. But darling how will you taste victory if you can’t embrace the mud. Things are hard, and they will get harder, but you mustn’t back down. If you leave the battlefield, you’ll lose your crown.

“But I’m tired of fighting. I’m tired of bleeding. I’m tired of everything. I can’t take it anymore. I’ve lost all my battles and now I’m losing this war. I quit. I’m sinking to my knees. Go give hope to someone stronger and better than me. You don’t understand. These demons in my head won’t leave me alone. They’ve carved their way and now they’re making a home. These thoughts I’m running away from, say things would be better if I was gone. I don’t see my road or any reason to carry on. Look…others are better off than me. They’re climbing mountains while I can’t even stand on my feet. I’m sinking in this ground and I can’t seem to ascend. No matter what road I choose it brings me to a dead end. I don’t even know what I’m fighting for. I quit. I can’t do this anymore.

Hope gently knelt by my side. He lifted my head and said, “I know there are explosions erupting inside. I know you’re scared, and you’re afraid to fall. But you can’t rise if you don’t learn how to crawl. I know giving up seems easy because you can’t take the ache, but how will you reform if you don’t break? Without all this dirt on your skin, how will your journey ever begin? The dark clouds looming above your head will part someday and you’ll see the blue sky. Keep holding on. I promise you’ll get by. I know all you see is darkness, and the road ahead is filled with thorns. Your destination looks empty and your bridges are torn. You can’t open your windows, and there is a seal on your door. I know you can’t walk; your legs are sore. But you must try again and again; knock on every wall, whenever you can. So darling, throw those pills away, you’ve clenched so tight. If you want to see the sun, you’ll have to pass through this night. If you want to win this war, you’ll have to keep your head held up high. So darling, pick yourself up because no one will come and do it for you. If you had the courage to fight, then you should have the courage to pull through. Don’t you dare let those thoughts crawl into your mind? There will always be hope, just look inside.

Poetry book out now- Curing My Venom

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