The perks of Anxiety

I’m always prepared for every situation. You know how there are different dimensions in the world with different possibilities. Like in one dimension I’m might be a successful author, while in another one I might not have anxiety. I would choose the second option over and over again.

But regardless, in my mind I’m prepared for every single one of those possibilities. For example, if there’s an earthquake. I’m prepared. If there is a meteoroid, I’m prepared. If there’s an earthquake plus a meteoroid I’m prepared.

My mind works as fast as a computer with 5G internet. If you ask me what could possibly go wrong, I would name a thousand different scenarios on the tip of my tongue in every situation we’re in. If you give me five minutes, I would write you a book.

My “flight and fight” response is so damaged that I’m prepared to fight or flight at any given moment. If there’s a creak in the wall, I’ll be out of the house faster than Hussain bolt. I know all the exists and all the escape routes. I’ll jump out of a window if I have to.

Sometimes I tire myself so much physically and mentally that I knock out as soon as my head touches the pillow and sometimes, I can’t sleep so I create more scenarios in my head to prepare myself for things that most likely won’t ever happen.

I’m never late to any place. Because I get anxious if I am. So, I’m always early to every single place I have to be. Like at the doctor’s appointment. I was there before the doctor was.

But all jokes aside. Anxiety doesn’t have any perks. It’s like you’re drowning in water and no matter how hard you try to reach the surface you just can’t. It’s like burning even when you’re sitting in an ice freezer. It’s that constant thudding of your heart and the stomach pains. And that splicing headache sending jolts of electricity throughout your entire body. Anxiety is that constant feeling of unease.

I know how bad anxiety can get… I’ve been there and sometimes even without warning I find myself drowning in the same muddy water. But look you’re stronger than that. Over power your thoughts. Tame them. Show them who the boss is. It’s not easy. I know. But neither was fighting a billion sperms to fertilize that egg. But you did that and I’m a hundred percent sure you can choke slam anxiety and when you do that don’t let it go…

17 thoughts on “The perks of Anxiety

  1. Like you, I am always prepped for flight and I too van come up with everything that could go wrong, always arrive early. I used to think that when I retired my nerves would be so experienced that i would be able to handle anything. unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way.My nerves are rubbish! But
    I have at least learned to live more in the moment and having moved back to NY I no longer worry about earthquakes, forest fires or tsunamis! After a certain age you learn to just accept what is.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. “dive don’t wade”… Interesting perspective… To get through water you have to swim you can’t walk! I think that’s the issue…. I can walk, I just don’t know how to swim.

      Like

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